Same way you eat an elephant...

Wat Chedi Luang

This entry is part summery of my recent past, part mental-processing, part excuse, part homework-for-you, and always incomplete.  (it is a bit wordy on my part, but your part comes in at the end)

Visakha Bucha Day

"Focus" in your daily life comes easy when you’re on the road since survival instincts are no longer on vacation, yet I feel like a Golden Retreiver that just walked on to the local high school tennis team’s practice court.

My brain has been gobbling it all up in typical ego-maniac fashion, “More, more, more!”  while my logic pleads to pump the breaks. There’s so much information that it becomes overwhelming to the point of paralysis.  I can't even chose a topic for my blog!

One of the Kuti's destroyed in a violent storm - no witches were harmed, only demons

So... Let me try and nutshell my brain’s gluttonous diet in recent past (this part is about me and my nutshell, if not interested, skip to lunch, below):

What I learned about Thailand’s civil struggle and cultural origins were quickly over-shadowed by Burma’s genocides.  Then, just as quickly, those injustices are pushed aside by a demanding mental health crisis (not my own) involving a schizophrenic in the middle of a forest monastery. 

What the schizophrenic also turns out to be, is the gatekeeper of a Noah-sized flood of thoughts, encompassing...

Forest Monastery meditation

-The realization of how thin the line is between sane and insane; 

-A contemplation of a culture’s belief system that has basis on a sane man who fought demons the same way that this schizophrenic did;  

-Comparisons between Western and Eastern religion, 

  -their roles for each society, 

  -their symbiotic relationship within each culture, 

-All along with a new understanding of how the brain works, and how the body and soul can override it, which leads me to developing an already established school of psychological thought that literally changes the way I think. 

*deep breath*

If you left me enough time alone with only this outlined fodder and a giant dictionary and reference book, I feel I could come out with two sociology study journals, a religious-society comparison article, a self help book, a psychology theory-comic book, an autobiography, and a cheap thriller novel.  

  ...intermission…

Yes, we hitch hiked on this through the mountain roads. "It was so reckless, even if we were Thais, Thai people would look as us and go, 'whoa, that's crazy.'" 

...and, back!

Instead of taking my time with these issues, I leave them undeveloped and on pause.  I immediately start interacting and helping to train a Kareni village publication who reports on Burmese refugees and replaces everything in my head, once again, by their struggle.

Road to the Kareni Village

"How can I help out??" I think, as I come down with something that I thought was Dangue Fever, and spend the next few days in the fetal position in my guest house, pondering my own mortality, habits, health, how alone one can be when you travel and where I want to be in life the next time I get this sick (don’t even get me started on health care and America’s view vs. the rest of the world’s view on it)  

Lucky for you, audience! This train of thought is interrupted by a notice that student loans are due, with no more deferments available, a visa application needs chest X-rays from registered doctors in Singapore and the post office has lost my oh so important package…  so when I realize that I’m still putting my blog off, I sit down and ask myself “Where the hell do I start?!

First bite: Processing...

Common lunch for a monk

It’s the same way you eat an elephant: One bite at a time.  I’m finding out processing is one of the most important aspects for self-actualization, wisdom, happiness, grounding, loving, understanding vs. knowing.  I’m not saying that I am much of the above, but am some of the later,  and it does seem to have a huge correlation. 

Studies have been made that show that keeping a journal/diary is in high correlation with people who “tend to be happier with their life.”  It’s because people realize what their day actually consists of and it allows for appreciation and processing.

for further understanding on this point, find time to watch this beautiful documentary, shot by ordinary people from youtube, around the world, all on July 24th:
  

..but keeping a journal is not for everyone. Some people meditate to process.  Some draw, run, walk, bike, make jewelry, drink coffee, make videos, talk to people, talk to themselves…. The amount of ways is vast, and it always speaks to the individual.  My own way contradicts all of my education – which is almost completely visual.  I don’t draw or work on photos to process my thoughts.  I can’t spell, and have never even really trained myself to write, but I’m such an extrovert that I need to be talking to someone to process.  I’m just polite enough to not put others through it (until this blog! Muahahahaha!)

...hahaha...ha

So here’s where you come in and gain. This is where your awareness begins.  

How do you process?  How do you consider your day?  Your relationship?  Your potential relationship? Your political views? That a$$ hole that flipped you off on the highway?  That smirk that the coffee barista gave you when they handed you your latte (ARE you supposed to tip them??) That white hair that keeps popping up (honestly, no one notices who doesn’t already care deeply about you).  The reach of your new facebook cover photo?  Your new homework? How can these sunflowers get so ridiculously tall??

It doesn’t have to be stunning, just personal, and should literally take less than a minute.  Use that answer for your own advantage.  You know what I mean. :)

If you want an offshoot question/s, maybe take a moment to ask what things you actually process.  How long do you take to consider certain issues?  Why is facebook already up on you browser before you finished even answering your question?

Answer for yourself, aware yourself to grow ;)  if you want to share, post down below.